Thursday, July 22, 2010

Kids, children, bambionos ....Oh boy

Someone once said, "You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance", and they could not have been more accurate! I just came back from a ride to Hell and back with a 6 year old and a 2 year old -both I love dearly, but this was just too much.

Now don't get me wrong, I love children, I love their innocence, I love their creativity... but there's this little breaking point when those little rascals grow horns and tails.

Ladies and gentlemen, in the past week, I've been bitten, kicked, slapped, got my ear pulled, my shirt slobbered on and ran a block in very uncomfortable shoes, now you might assume I have kids, wrong! The kids in this post are my 2 nephews -I'm 21 remember?- One is just starting his terrible 2 and the other is starting the "why?" age, both will drive any sane person mad.

I'll give you an example of what I was going through today:

" 'Twas a dark dark night, the moon shone vividly over the bayou, a black leather studded carriage strolled calmly through the forest, nothing but the sound of the wind, the water and the sighs of a slumbering maiden. With a thundering cry and a sudden jolt she woke up to site of 2 thieves hijacking the carriage, they swiftly clamped her mouth and muffled her desperate cries for helps and...."

Ok this is probably a little too melodramatic -go figure- what really happened is after hearing the kids jump and play in the car for 40 minutes having this conversation:

O: "we're going hoooome"
H: "Ooome!"
O: "Don't repeat what I say!"
H: "yaaaay"
O: "Stop it"
H: "ithhh"
O: "mooooom"
H: "maaaaamaaaaa"
O: "moooom he's repeating me!"
H: *laughing*
O: "moooom he's laughing at me"

.... and it goes on for another half an hour, unfortunately I didn't have my ipod with me and somehow was stuck in the middle, so what a girl to do? sleep, right?... wrong!

I tried sleeping, 5 minutes after I dose off it goes very very very quite and I wake up with the elder's hand clamping my nose and the little ones hands practically inside my mouth -I'm secretly convinced it's revenge for not letting them have ice cream with dinner, they get freakishly hyper- and the whole car bursting in laughter over their ingenious method of waking me up...

I honestly can't wait to have kids of my own, but in the past few weeks I've realized how much of a handful they can really be, from stubbornness to moodiness to "mommy I think I made an accident", and the idea of starting pediatric medicine next year scares me a little bit, I adore them, but I'm not sure if I can tolerate ones I don't share DNA with, I seriously can predict one of 2 situations happening:

A) I'll be the very sweet doctor who they'll weasel themselves out of her hands with a hug

B) I'll be the b*tch that makes them pee their pants when they see my face

Which one will it be? Well, I guess we'll have to wait and see...

Off the record:

What's the worst thing a child can do to tick you off?


  1. I spent last night with my little cousins and they drove me insane. They talk nonsense, make stupid noises to grab your attention and won't stop fighting. I am pretty sure I'll hate next year. Pregos and kids are not my people.

    I advise you to read Why We Suck? By Denis Leary.The chapters about kids will make you think twice about calling a kid "innocent" ever again.

    Congrats on your first post. Keep'em coming. :)

  2. O.M.G.
    u made it .. u'r actually blogging!!
    dodah and Fadiosis r reeeeeally good xD

    "I honestly can't wait to have kids of my own"
    I would never ever say that- at least at the moment. I don't like children! don't get me wrong and don't think I'm a horrible person. u can say... I'm picky .. I like good looking children who r sooo adorable n' sooo cute with soooo innocent, pure and funky attitude! xD
    I HATE children who r TOOOOOOOOO spoiled.. who make their voices really stupid n' annoying coz they'r too spoiled. and of course, I hate children who cry all the time for no reason.
    u must be saying now how evil of a person I must be .. poor kids who would be fallin' in my hands! but don't worry .. although I hate them, I don't do harm to them. ;P

    but I can't wait to c my nephew coming to this world!❤ I can feel the love engorging me. I can't wait to hold him .. to feed him .. to kiss him and pinch his cheeks till they turn red .. to play with him .. to spoil him .. to buy him candies .. to hear him call me "dada" or aunty .. to feel his adorable,soft tinny tiny lil hand warping my index finger ( I love when babies do that ❤ ) .. I just can't wait to be a good aunt, I really wanna be that..
    maybe f I made that come true, there will be hope for me to wish to have my own children! =)

    love ur post .. keep up the good work.
    mmwaaah ❤

  3. Ghada hada kolo mashallah. Sounds to me like you love children.

  4. I was thinking the same thing loooooool, Ghada just wait till your nephew turns 2 and you wake up with his index in your eye and he's going, "eye? eye? eyeeeeee"

  5. I love this post. I have, wait let me count.. 9 nephews and nieces and 7 of them has made scars over my face, neck, arms or legs.!!

    what's the worst they've done to me?? well

    رح اكتب عربي و الخيال ليكِ... كنت باشوف درجة الجينيتكس لما ولد اختي العفريت كان بيلعب بفرش الاستشوار... كان في لخبطة في الدرجات فقمت معصبة و جاء عندي يبغى يمشط بالغصيبة (يمشط = يقطع شعرك و يخمش وجهك)... المهم سحبت منه الفرشة.. عارفة لما في جزء مدبب حق لما تفرقي شعرك؟؟؟ داك الشي دخل في عيني و جلست دقيقتين خفت افتح عيني الاقي نفسي ما بأشوف...


    no no wait. that was the worst situation anyone could experience. but what makes me tick is (zann)... i could slap someone endlessly for that... and actually anything about them :p..

    I love your post.. ♥♥

  6. ewa ghada r u sure u hate kids :P ?? btw... your description... is that estrogen talking? sounds like a line from a motherhood movie xD..